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IC contact post/voice mail - ADSTRING

Hey, you've reached Hanna Cross, paranormal investigator extraordinaire!

Leave a message and I will totally get back to you as soon as humanly possible. Which will be soon. Ish. Awesome, thanks!

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[Why are you sleeping Axel? Why are you leaving him with this?]

Okay, okay. Hold your horses. [Hanna's just going to pinch his nose and groan.] He gave her the book because she was asking questions that he didn't want to answer. [That Hanna didn't want to answer either, but he promised he'd help.

He still has no idea why.] A girl can't get pregnant unless they have sexual intercourse with a boy. Okay? And that's a really personal thing, you don't have sex with someone, to make a baby, unless you really like them, want to spend the rest of your lives together kind of I love you kind of like. [Or its an accident and well, HE WON'T GO INTO THAT.]

Axel likes Xion, but...he's kind of spoken for and she's too young for him anyways. Their friends, not friends who have sex.

Does that answer your question?

Xion asked him questions? [That, he did not know. He mostly said it out loud to Xion, whom he's looking at questionably. Then he listens to the PCD again.

Prepare yourself for questions Hanna. There are a lot of them.]

Er, 'pregnant?' How is Axel spoken for? He can speak for himself. [Not now, because he's asleep, but.] And what did you say? 'I love you kind of like?' What is that? You're not making any sense.

[He needs like. A chart or something.]

Yes, she did. But anyways, first order of business, getting pregnant is when a girl has sex with a boy, and his sperm, which are reproductive cells, enter her body and fertilize her egg, which is a girl's reproductive cells. After that, a baby starts to grow inside of her. That is where babies come from, alright?

[Ugh. Ugh.] Um, Axel is spoken for because he and I are dating. Which means he is my boyfriend, and he's probably most definitely not going to be doing sexy things with any one. [But him, but he's not going to say that.

And oh my god Roxas, really? More? What is his life.] Um, its when you love someone. But, there really are different kind of loves, but we can get into that later. [He'd rather just write him out a chart so he can refer to it later.]

[He needs a slideshow, more like.

You can't see him, Hanna, but Roxas is a little grossed out.] I didn't know girls had eggs in them. ...Alright. [Is 'secks' really the right word for all of this, though? It sounds like something that would hurt.]

You and Axel? [There's a small pause.] Axel and I are both boys and we're friends. So are he and I dating?

[Love??? SO LOST.] Whatever you say. This is getting too complicated. So nothing is going to happen to Xion, right?

Well, we are mammals. That means that we give live birth, yanno? At least females do. They grow babies inside. Like...A dog! They have essentially the same stuff down there. [Don't have sex with a dog, Roxas.]

Yeah, we're toge- [What? What?] NO! No...no. Its. Different. You're just friends, I'm his...[Shit, this is confusing.] He's my...Well? Uh, significant other. We're a couple. You know...together. [How could he explain that to Roxas without him getting confused again? He has no other words for 'dating' that he can think of.]

No, nothing is going to happen to Xion. She's fine.

Okay. Hold on. [Xion was nearly having a panic attack, so he'd better go tell her she won't be having any babies in her any time soon.]

[Aaaand he's back.]Okay. You're saying you've seen the inside of a dog? ...That's kind of gross.

But Axel's asleep. You two can't be together. Unless you're taking care of him right now. ...Hanna, how long's it been since you got some sleep anyway?

[Is this where all this weird information is coming from? Roxas's gut says probably.]

No! No. Oh my god Roxas, you can't take all this stuff so literally.

[He's just going to be covering his eyes and groaning.] Xion kind of gets dating. Ask her about it. Please? [For the sake of his sanity. And to be completely honest, he hasn't slept well at all. But. He doesn't need to tell Roxas about that.]

I got some sleep yesterday.

[It's not his fault Hanna's being confusing. But Roxas won't say that out loud.]

If you need some more, I can take on duty later. [Even if he's seen how it looks to feed Vriska and Axel while they're sleeping. And it's nasty.] I'll message you first thing if they wake up.

[It kind of breaks his heart a little to have to use a dribble cloth to feed his sleeping boyfriend, but at least he doesn't choke on it.] No...it's okay. I can handle it.

[He doesn't like sleeping much any more, due to a certain nightmareous creature.] Thanks for the offer though.

[Roxas is the same. But he's used to restless sleeps and weird dreams.]

Talk to you later. [Finally that info session is over. Why does everything Roxas finds out have to confuse him more. Anyway, it's back to Xion!]

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IC contact post/voice mail - ADSTRING

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